Questions about Bisexuality
What (or who) is a bisexual?
- A bisexual is a person who is sexually and/or emotionally attracted to people of both sexes.
- Sexual identity is a personal choice, there are many people who indulge in sexual activity with people of both sexes who do not label or see themselves as bisexual. People may call themselves straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, polysexual, or just sexual, and enjoy or desire sex with both women and men.
- People may identify as bisexual because of the feelings they have for both sexes, but engage in sexual activity or have relationships with people of only on gender.
So I can sleep with people of both sexes and not be bisexual?
- Yes. Each person can decide which labels they want to apply to themselves. Bisexual support groups do not force people top "come out" as bisexual.
Are bisexuals really just gay or straight, but have not made up their minds yet?
- Bisexuality is an option in its own right. A lack of information about bisexuality is probably the cause of most confusion. It can be a painful process to identify as bisexual because there is generally little support for people trying to assert a bisexual identity. Hence some people may opt to use a more easily understood label.
Are bisexuals "fifty-fifty"?
- Not necessarily. Some bisexuals are equally attracted equally to both genders, but many are attracted more to one sex than the other. For instance a person may be attracted to men for sex, but feel more comfortable having social relationships with women.
Do bisexuals cheat on the partners? Are the promiscuous?
- Bisexuals are no more or less promiscuous than any other group of sexually aware adults. Becausemost bisexual people think deeply about their sexuality, they have probably also considered the sorts of relationships that work for them. Contrary to myth, a bisexual does not need to be involved with a man and a woman at the same time. Some may cheat on, or deceive their partner, as occurs in other groups, but many are faithful and honest to their partners.
So I can be married and bisexual?
- Yes. Many bisexuals have long term monogamous relationships, even though others may have a greater number and range of partners. One thing all the best arrangements or relationships have in common is a commitment to honesty. Additionally, your sexuality may have altered over time, so just because you're attracted to the same sex now doesn't mean that you were hiding something when you committed to your current relationship.
How common is bisexuality?
- According to various surveys and studies, at least 30% of sexually active people admit to some form of bisexual behaviour. The older the person, the more likely they are to experience a same-sex encounter, and to admit to such behaviour. Social attitudes inhibit many people from admitting bisexual or homosexual behaviour, and this can lead to under-reporting of the number of bisexually active people in society.
Don't bisexuals spread HIV/AIDS?
- Bisexual men are often used as scapegoats for the spread of HIV from the gay community into the heterosexual community. Lesbians are also concerned that bisexual women may pose a threat to their community because bisexual women have sex with men. However, it is unsafe sexual behaviour, rather than sexual orientation, that puts everyone at risk of infection. Everyone, bisexuals as well as straights, gays and lesbians, must continue to educate themselves about safer sex practices. Quite simply, no matter who you have sex with, make sure it is "safer sex".
Support services and bisexuality.
- In general if you contact any support service that indicates that they deal with gay or lesbian issues they should also be able to help you with issues you have about your, your partner's, or another persons bisexuality. But be aware that some individuals in these organizations may have a negative attitude towards bisexuality. If you encounter this let the management know so that they can prevent it happening again..
Where can I get more information?
- Most large cities have some sort of Bi and or Gay support network. Check the local phone book for details.
- There are also quite a few websites which provide information, I have listed a few below.